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The Leadership Challenge: Office Backstabbing – 5 Leadership Lies to Avoid

May 16, 2015 By Sam Palazzolo, Managing Director

The Point: In the art of a knife fight, two individuals each equipped with a knife circle each other thrusting their weapons at one another. It’s a rudimentary form of face-to-face-combat. And given your odds as a leader, nine times out of ten you’d bet on yourself to be victorious (we’ll give one out of ten to your combatant!) But what if (1) you don’t have a knife, (2) you’re not expecting a fight, and (3) you aren’t facing your competitor… Now the odds have swung completely around and not only are you favored, but defeat is all around you. Sound like your typical office backstabbing incident? In this post, we’ll take a look at how you as a leader can not only fight this unfair fight, but come out victorious in the end in knowing/using to your advantage the five lies of office backstabbing… Enjoy!

Knife Fighting Fantasy

Here’s an interesting leadership challenge to ponder: To say that all is fair in love and war is one thing, but is all fair in the office while at war (Business is war, right?) If business is in fact war, there are two rules you need to keep in mind right from the start when it comes to office backstabbing:

Whatever you do, you must live to fight another day, inevitably to fight against the next backstabbing episode.
If you are successful to live to fight another day, you’ll want to insure that you don’t compromise your ethics/end up on the wrong side of the battle in the eyes of Human Resources (HR) or the law.

Remember, being a leader is tough work. You “give blood” every day at work, and it’s your career on the line and personal lifestyle that could be sacrificed if unsuccessful. Don’t let anyone tell you that don’t have the right to defend yourself, fight back, or take action. Here then are the 5 lies to watch out for:

Lie #5: You’ll Have Plenty of Time To See Them Coming

In all the executive coaching conversations that I’ve had with clients over the years where the topic of backstabbing was brought up (I’ve worked with 500+ leaders to date), only one of them ever said that he saw it coming. This leader was no less aware of his surroundings, the stakeholders actions that he worked with, nor out of touch with the business at hand. Yet, time after time I heard how they felt completely blindsided by the attack.

Backstabbing Avoidance Tip: Watch your back at all times, and get stakeholders (think of them as the trusted “inner circle”) to watch your back as well!

Lie #4: There’s Going to be a Backstabbing at High Noon

The majority of the executive coaching conversations I heard excuse after excuse regarding backstabbing avoidance being taught in leadership development programs. The problem is that in leadership development programs the scenarios presented were never real. Instead, the backstabbing scenes were like something out of an old Western movie instead of the stealth business streets pounded daily by these leaders.

Backstabbing Avoidance Tip: Your backstabber isn’t watching old Westerns nor are they participating in leadership development scenarios. They are moving like a terrorist and as such act with a high level of randomness.

Lie #3: But How Can I Avoid the Fight?

Most leaders believe that they can get out of any situation that they are put into… Good situations… Bad situations… Either way, the leader believes that they will come out the other end victorious. This is plain stupid and wrong! This lie can usually be heard by leaders when they start the rebuttal with “But…” In all the cases I’ve heard, of the millions of possible options the leader could have taken they always seem to focus on staying and fighting. Remember Dale Carnegie’s advice on winning an argument: The only way to win an argument is to never get into an argument in the first place.

Backstabbing Avoidance Tip: Think back to Rule I above… You need to live to fight another day. Staying and fighting will accomplish little. Running away is your leadership ego perception at work… Think of it instead of taking the high road!

Lie #2: They’re Going to Backstab You in a Certain Way

Think of the typical leadership development office backstabbing case that you’ve explored (You have explored the topic in your leadership development program, right?) What did it consist of? Typically, let’s think of the scenario of a disgruntled worker. Perhaps they’ve been passed over for a promotion, or better yet they don’t want in on the latest program of the month (Change isn’t their thing, you know?) Now you probably know how to handle this type of case with tact and polish… This backstabbing is pretty easy!

However, what if the associate is going stealth? They’re publishing information online about you, the company, and what a joke the whole scenario is. You didn’t cover that one in leadership development did you?

Backstabbing Avoidance Tip: Just as you’d brainstorm solutions to a problem, attempt to brainstorm problems and what your solutions will be. Think of it as a contingency planning exercise.

Lie #1: They’re Going to Listen to Your Logic and Admit They Were Wrong

The leadership fantasy that you’re going to overcome a backstabbing by hearing your assailant out, confirming that you correctly heard what they said, and then attempting to educate them from your perspective will get you nowhere. Avoiding a backstabbing shouldn’t rely purely on opportunity and chance.

Unless your backstabber is a simpleton, the odds of you successfully absorbing the backstabbing, confirming why you’re being stabbed, and then pulling yourself together to have a legitimate debate is very, very slim. The reality is that you cannot safely control the situation. While there may be actions you can take to momentarily delay the backstabbing, unfortunately I typically hear of horror stories where there was simply too much bludgeoning absorbed by the leader to adequately mount a counter offensive.

Backstabbing Avoidance Tip: Throw logic out the window, and think fight or flight… with heavy emphasis on the flight!

SUMMARY

In this post we’ve taken a look at two rules to keep in mind when experiencing office politics. We’ve also reviewed five lies that leaders typically have in mind when countering backstabbing. Remember the two rules and you should be able to live to lead another day!

Sam Palazzolo

PS – You may also enjoy some of the other recent posts I wrote:

The Leadership Challenge: Should You Stay OR Should You Go? 5 Criteria

April 29, 2015 By Sam Palazzolo, Managing Director

The Point: Perhaps you’ve been pushed to the brink… Maybe you eye a greener pasture in the next meadow… Regardless, it’s often a difficult career decision for a leader to determine if they should stay with their current organization or defect to a new one. There are countless criteria that you can weigh to justify staying or going, so in this post we compile five (5) criteria to consider in your leadership career management moment… Enjoy!

The Clash Had It Right

The English punk band “The Clash” of the 1980’s might have been on to something for a leader considering transitioning from one organization to another. Here are the vocals lead singer Mick Jones belted out (as well as accompanying backup vocals in Ecuadorian Spanish):

Should I stay or should I go now? (Yo! ¿Me frío o lo soplo?)

If I go there will be trouble (Si me voy, va a haber peligro)

And if I stay it will be double (Si me quedo, es doble)

So you gotta let me know (Pero que tienes que decir)

Should I cool it or should I blow? (¿Me frío o lo soplo?)

Should I stay or should I go now? (¿Me frío o lo soplo?)

So the questions posed in the song are at the heart of the leadership transition moment… Should you stay OR should you go? There are a lot of reasons to stay at your current organization, but there also might be some pretty compelling reasons to depart. For example, you already know the “devil” you dance with day-in/day-out in the current company you keep. On the other hand, at a new organization there might be a better leadership team. Here then are five (5) criteria assembled to allow you, the leader, to assess this often tumultuous time.

Criteria 5: Are You “Taken Care Of” as a Leader?

Often times I hear from leaders during executive coaching horror stories of how they are not taken care of. They typically have low/no response when asked “Where’s the love?” Organizations not ripe culturally with respect, proper compensation, trust, innovation, and leadership development growth opportunities take note.

Criteria 4: Lack of Empowerment

There’s been a lot of headlines in the leadership development space regarding employee engagement recently, but not so much on the topic of empowerment. Unfortunately, empowerment lies at the heart of the engagement moment for most leaders and their organizations. Think of the concept of “Intrapreneur” and you get this criteria.

Criteria 3: Politics

Don’t think for a minute that there is an organization out there that is absent of politics! While it’s an idealistic moment, and one that many an executive recruiter will share with you to entice the recruiting effort, the reality is that every organization has politics. But are there less politics taking place, or perhaps those that drive in a more positive direction (That’s possible, right?)

Criteria 2: Trustworthy Leaders

Remember in these consideration moments that your ability to interview stakeholders at the potential organization should provide you with an accurate assessment of them, and no criteria to judge should weigh heavier than the trust the leaders in the organization have. I think Stephen M.R. Covey said it best that with trust, anything is possible… without it, well that’s another story!

Criteria 1: Recognition

When was the last time you received recognition in your current organization and was it appropriate? Real time feedback for example is a great barometer to judge not only if an organization provides accountability measurements to their stakeholders, but provides insight into how.

SUMMARY

I hope these five (5) criteria provide you with perspective on perhaps one of the more challenging dilemmas a leader can face in managing their career. In executive coaching sessions I’ve reviewed leadership issues ranging from being taken care of, empowerment, politics, trust, and recognition. These are just a few of the criteria you should weigh in determining if you should stay or go. So what will you do? Will you stay, or will you go? Remember The Clash inasmuch, if you go there will be trouble. But, if you stay there could be double!

Sam Palazzolo

PS – You may also enjoy some of the other recent posts I wrote:

The Leadership Challenge: Succession Planning

April 10, 2015 By Sam Palazzolo, Managing Director

The Point: There is a growing leadership void left behind by retiring baby boomer leaders. Human Resource Executives are finding it difficult to identify/locate replacements. Part of the difficulty lies in defining leadership, developing leaders, and ability to deliver such development opportunities effectively. What’s a poor leader to do if they can’t identify/create a succession plan? Perhaps they could delay/refuse to retire? Seriously though, read on for details on the problems, as well as solutions to create successful succession plans… Enjoy!

Succession Planning is More Difficult in Today’s Economy

Nearly two out of every three Human Resource (HR) Executives that participated in a recent poll claim that succession planning is more difficult in today’s economy (The actual number was 59%). Their comments were captured in The Global Workforce Leadership Survey conducted by SABA (A large HR software service provider). With approximately four (4) million baby boomers retiring each/every year, there simply isn’t enough quality candidates to fill this void.

The findings of the survey show that the biggest obstacles for powering future business growth are threefold: (1) Differences in perspective surrounding leadership, (2) Leadership development, and (3) Accessibility to online tools for that leadership development.

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are – The Leader Within That Is!

Human Resource Executives report difficulties in identifying leadership in current employees nearly half the time (46%). Part of this difficulty lies in employees that rarely list leadership skills (only 36% do).

But this begs the question, and lies at the heart of this fundamental problem… What are Human Resources Executives doing if they (1) don’t cultivate a leadership development environment and (2) how do they not know their own employees?

Technical Skills Aren’t Enough

Marshall Goldsmith, one of my mentors in Stakeholder Centered Coaching, is famous for his line regarding “What got you here, won’t get you there.” In other words, according to Marshall your technical skills will get you your first leadership position, but it’s your non-technical skills that will get you your second. What exactly are these non-technical skills though?

Non-technical skills are often considered “soft” skills. They have nothing to do with the specifics of your job (Engineering, Finance, Marketing, etc.) However, they have everything to do with the performance/quality/results of your job. Think of these non-technical skills as consistent qualities that leaders posses regardless of function and you get the idea (Time management, project management, communication skills for leaders, etc.)

So Where Are All The Future Leaders?

I shared The Global Workforce Leadership Survey results with a client of mine, and her response was a classic! “Sam, what were you expecting? Have you ever tried to complete a job application on a SABA run software system?” In less than an instant I knew exactly what she was saying. The truth of the matter is that I have in fact completed a job application online using a SABA run system and found the process to be brain damage! I know that career moves are supposed to be taken seriously, and time to complete an application should not be a consideration. However, I seriously doubt that a Millenial generation (or any other generation for that matter) is willing to put themselves through this long, tedious, and laborious process. I doubt any of the other job applicant software packages are any easier though.

So if you, your organization are like the Human Resource Executives that participated in this survey, you probably are having a difficult time locating employees that want to step into leadership positions (or worse yet, are choosing incorrectly from your talent pool!) Here’s a thought… Why not ask current baby boomer leadership who should/shouldn’t be considered prior to their departure?

SUMMARY

So in this post, we’ve taken a look at how succession planning is more difficult in today’s economy, how part of the problem might just be human resource executives reliance on brain damaging software systems for applicant tracking, if you are relying on your technical expertise to carry you up the leadership ladder you’re kidding yourself, and a potential solution regarding how you can/should/might locate future leadership for your organization.

Sincerely yours,

Sam Palazzolo

PS – You may also enjoy some of the other recent posts I wrote:

Sam Palazzolo is the Managing Director at Tip of the Spear Ventures, an agile Venture Capital and Business Advisory Services firm specializing in Executive Coaching, Leadership Development, and Communication Skills Training for Leaders.

The Leadership Challenge: Why HR Isn’t Developing YOU as a Leader

April 9, 2015 By Sam Palazzolo, Managing Director

The Point: Ever wonder why you’re not being developed as a leader in your organization? After all, we’ve probably all heard the corporate “urban myth” of the modern organization that grew from startup to legitimate industry contender (Think Apple, Facebook, or any tech company that’s publicly traded). These organizations are typically replete with employee perks (coffee barista’s onsite, ping pong tables, nap pods, etc.) And the coup de tat is that they not only recognize leadership talent, but reward it by sending them off to leadership development training. In this post, I’ll take a look at why your Human Resources department isn’t developing you as a leader. I know you’ll be as surprised as I am (but then again, maybe not so much!)… Enjoy!

You’re a High Potential Employee, Right?

I’ve spent a lot of time on leadership development engagements in an attempt to put together a high potential team of what you could consider “up and comers” for organizations. Some organizations look at this identification process for high potentials with scientific rigor, complete with key performance indicators, data collection methodology, and elected cross-functional boards to sift through/select final candidates. Others, typically leave it up to the Human Resources (HR) department. After all, the logic goes, who knows our people better than Human Resources? They did bring them into the organization!

So if Human Resources is selecting your organization’s future leaders, what could go wrong? Korn Ferry, the self-described “preeminent authority on leadership and talent” released a global executive survey that found gaps (significant gaps) in leadership development opportunities for Human Resources professionals (I’d have you CLICK HERE to see the study, but they don’t have it on their website as of this writing – They do however link you to their “Aligning Business and Human Capital Strategy” advertisement).

I’m in HR, Therefore We Develop Others (But Not Ourselves!)

The Korn Ferry survey of some 700+ executives (functional expertise omitted) finds nearly half (47%) work at companies that don’t offer leadership development for Human Resources staff. That’s quite the leadership challenge! Of the 53% that do offer leadership development for HR, two-thirds (66%) say the development isn’t as “rigorous” as is needed/should be when compared with leadership programs outside the HR function. In other words, if you’re in IT you can look forward to one great leadership development program. However, if you’re in HR the program will not hold similar qualities.

On top of it all, respondents said that Senior HR talent doesn’t receive relevant developmental opportunities critical to perform optimally (58% say so). So if leadership development is a crucial cornerstone to organization performance (Read that as you’d better have a succession plan), then why is there so little development taking place within the HR function? After all, isn’t this where the majority of talent development initiatives stem from?

The Leadership Challenge: Developing Tomorrow’s Leaders Today

I’ll be the first to recognize that developing leaders is a tall order for any organization. It is an especially tall order for those organizations where HR does not share a seat at the C-Suite Table. When I read these results I happened to be having a conversation with one of the leaders that I work with. In reviewing this with them, it came as little/no surprise at all. Her direct quote was “What about this surprises you? Most organizations deem Human Resources to be a worthless function.” Scandalous!

I think the aspect of this study that concerns me the most is that this is perhaps just the “tip” of the leadership development ice-berg. I’ve worked with Korn Ferry before, and find the quality of their work second to none (except my team’s!) What concerns me is the study was conducted with executives from their database, a database that no doubt is loaded with HR Leadership.

So if a study is conducted on HR Leadership Development with HR Leadership, how many actually called their own organizations “out” on not developing leaders in the HR function? My guess is that the majority hedged-their responses with a positive bias. Even if the minority answered the survey accurately (full truth disclosure), the results are mind-boggling.

SUMMARY

In this post, we’ve taken a look at leadership development within the Human Resources function, and why it is that you may not be receiving such development opportunities as a result. Unfortunately, the news as reported through a Korn Ferry survey is not good! So what should be Human Resources response to developing tomorrow’s leaders today, within their own function? Nothing less of best in class leadership development of course!

Sincerely yours,

Sam Palazzolo

PS – You may also enjoy some of the other recent posts I wrote:

Communication Skills for Leaders – Part III: Presenting

April 8, 2015 By Sam Palazzolo, Managing Director

In this three part series we’ll look to cover one of the most feared skills that a leader can possibly look to exhibit: Communication. Get communication skills for leaders right, and the world can be your oyster. Get communication skills for leaders wrong, and you’ll get nowhere near the results you could have achieved (Read that as NO oysters!) In Part I, we took a look at planning your presentation, in Part II we delved into proper practice/preparation you should undertake, and lastly here in Part III we’ll tackle presenting… Enjoy!

Communication Skills for Leaders – Presenting Your Presentation

When was the last time you witnessed a presentation and you had to actively think about what the speaker was saying? If you’re like most of the leaders that come to a “Communicate with Influence” workshop as part of their leadership development training, you probably can’t remember (sigh!) The reason why this is unfortunately the case is that most presentations are better cures for insomnia than they are for providing you with actionable information.

So what does it take to convey/share/discuss actionable information? The answer lies in asking questions. Let’s take a look at three (3) different types of questions you can ask your audience to keep engagement levels high and results-focused.

Ask a Rhetorical Question

A Rhetorical Question is a figure of speech in the form of a question that’s asked in order to make a point, rather than to elicit an answer. There are times when rhetorical questions are so repugnant that a question mark doesn’t need to end the statement (Remember, it’s implied).

Here’s a great question that was asked at a recent communication skills training for leaders session: “Can you imagine a world that never had been touched by Steve Jobs?” The question in and of itself opens itself up to multiple interpretations, and as such requires each of the members of the audience to ponder their own response. Better yet, each member is awaiting what/where you’ll go next (High engagement).

Polling Questions for Instant Feedback

I love polling questions, and it’s a good thing! When I was pioneering webinars I found that a virtual audience is much more vocal than one that is sitting in a room with you. Why? I have a lot of hypothesis from these early communication skills training for leaders examples, but the one that I keep coming back to is the nature of the polls and the medium through which they communicated (i.e., the computer).

Important to remember here that you must establish ground rules regarding how you want participant responses (“Raise your hand if you…” if live and “Use the Chat area to tell me…” if virtual).

The great aspect of polling questions is that you get feedback immediately from your audience. Important to note that you should consider all variations of answers when preparing your presentation, or have facts on hand regarding how population segment at large answered similar questions which you can share.

What? Where? When? Who? and How? Questions (But NEVER Why?)

In my executive coaching sessions, I fall back on my training with Marshall Goldsmith and the International Coach Federation. It was drilled into my head that I should never, never, never begin a line of questions that began with the word “Why?” The logic for this, and try it for yourself as a leader, is that when asking a question with “Why?” will drive the participants to think logically, and absent of all emotions. As a result, think of the next time when you are about to use “Why?” and substitute it with any of the other W’s and the one H.

5 Presentation Habits that Should Be Avoided

While I’ve tried to present you with focused/results-oriented content here, I’d be remiss if I didn’t share some habits that will simply ruin your presentation. Stay away from these five bad habits:

Ummm – Toastmasters counts them, and so does your audience in a presentation. Say one and you may be Ok depending on who’s in the audience. Say more than one, or allow them to be periods between your verbal sentences and you will lose your audience!
Hands – If you’re like me, you are passionate when you speak. As a result, you not only move your hands, but your entire body! Do your best to limit movement of your hands. Keep the “I’m a Little Teapot” nursery rhyme in mind regarding what not to do.
Braggadocios – Keep bragging to a minimum… You’re audience will immediately hate you if they catch on (and yes, they are smart enough to catch on!) I once was an audience member with someone I really respected. They began the presentation with the “I got in late last night as a result of speaking in another city on the other side of the country and catching the last flight in…”Spare me, and your audience.
Slang/Jargon – If no one knows what you’re referring to when you speak in acronyms, then don’t! I know as well as you do that each company needs their own Rosetta Stone to decipher their own jargon, but please keep these comments to a minimum especially when dealing with external agencies to the organization.
Q&A – I could write an entire blog post on answering questions (If you’re interested, drop me a line). Here’s the bottom line when it comes to questions: If you’re going to open yourself up to taking them, you’d better have considered all that will/could/are asked of you. If you don’t prepare not only the questions, but most importantly the answers to each of them in advance you are setting yourself up for disaster!

SUMMARY

In Part I of this communication skills for leaders presentation series, we took a look at planning your presentation. In Part II of this series we looked at proper practice/preparation you should undertake. In the final part of this series (Part III) we’ve tackled presenting. We investigated asking rhetorical questions, how to leverage polling questions for immediate feedback, effective ways to start your questions (What? Where? When? Who? and How? Questions… But NEVER Why?), as well as 5 presentation habits that should be avoided.

Sincerely yours,

Sam Palazzolo

PS – You may also enjoy some of the other recent posts I wrote:

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